How to Uncover Hidden Beliefs About Your Fertility

At the core of many of our infertility and reproductive struggles is as limiting belief and negative thought pattern. Somewhere rooted in our subconscious are beliefs that we aren't good enough, we can't pregnant, and we are what we've been diagnosed with. 

In order to drop these beliefs and create a new healthy thought pattern we have to bring the limiting beliefs into our awareness just what it is that keeps us in a place of resistance. 

If there is resistance to whatever you desire, it will have a much harder time coming to you. Most often it is the resistance hidden in your belief about yourself,  that keeps whatever you want from coming to you. When it comes to your fertility, hidden beliefs can often be the the root of both fertility struggles and reproductive issues. This resistance can manifest as illness and disease. To uncover the root of these issues we can ask ourselves a line of questions that will help us get to the bottom.

Here is an example:

| What is my most limiting belief about my fertility?

I will have problems getting pregnant.

| Why do I believe this?

  • There's a history of infertility in my family
  • I've had issues in the past
  • I've had multiple sexual patterns
  • It hasn't happened yet
  • I've been on birth control for so long
  • The doctor told me I will have a hard time

| What do I currently know that makes this belief untrue?

  • My cycle is regular, I ovulate when I should
  • I've never been told I can't.
  • I decide what I choose to believe about my body.
  • Other people's experiences are not my own.
  • I am healthier than I have been in the past.
  • My body was made to do this. 

| In what ways has this belief about my fertility held me back? 

  • It's kept me from trying
  • It has hurt my relationship
  • It has caused me to not believe in my body and myself
  • It has made me fearful about the future
  • This makes me feel alone and like I'll never have the one thing I truly desire most. 

| How does it make me feel to have miss out on life because of this belief?

  • It makes me feel sad knowing I've allowed this belief to even keep me from trying. 
  • I wonder if I would be pregnant already if I just believed in myself. 

| What would I do with my life IF I no longer believed this?

  • I would feel so much more at ease and feel much better about trying
  • I wouldn't have so many concerns about the future
  • I would have an easier time trusting that everything is going to happen for me and my family, just when it should.
  • I would have more freedom to do the things I wanted to do because I wouldn't feel held back by this.

| Is there any current truth to this belief?

My cycle was off about six or seven months ago but I've gotten it back on track.

  • I could do a better job taking care of my health. 

| What can I do to change the circumstances I listed?

  • Make sure I am managing my stress and tracking my cycle
  • Eat more nourishing foods, exercise and practice more self care
  • Visiting the doctor to get test done to see what I need to work on. 

| What is the situation or outcome that I fear most that is tied to this limiting belief about my fertility?

I fear I'll never have the one thing I desire most which is a family of my own, and end up alone. 

| What are the odds of this happening?

Unlikely, I have no actual present indication that this is what will happen i the future. The odds are slim because I know that there are many ways to have a family. 

| How comfortable am I with the uncertainty but the need to take action anyway?

I have no choice but to get comfortable not knowing the outcome. Ultimately I need to release the need for control and  take actionable steps that will help me get the outcome I desire. 

| What are three to five actionable steps I can take this week to help me feel better about my fertility that will help me overcome this belief? (write this as if it already is true.)

  • I am making a conscious effort to always eat nourishing food.
  • I release the need to be so in control all the time. I trust the everything will happen just when it should.
  • I made an appointment with a doctor, naturopath, acupuncturist, or therapist so that I could get a better grip on my health.
  • I learned to track my cycle to know when I am most fertile.
  • Each morning I say affirmations to myself in my the mirror. 

Taking these steps would help the person in the example feel better much better about her body and her health. This would help her be able to know that the belief is rooted in her subconscious mind is not the current truth. She now knows that ultimately her fear is not that she won't be able to conceive, but instead that she won't have a family and will end up alone. When this fear pops up, asking herself "Is this currently true? Am I currently in the situation I fear most right now?" Most likely the answer will be "no" and she can remind herself to stay in the present.

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If the example was for someone who had Endometriosis, the belief may be "I'm going to have horrible periods until menopause". Using the questions above she could get to her core belief which may be that as soon as she got her diagnosis she has totally gave up on her health all together. From there she could create an actionable plan to help get her health back on track so that she has hope for her future.

Need some help uncovering the hidden beliefs about your fertility that may keeping you from getting pregnant or reproductive struggles?

Download the worksheet below to uncover hidden beliefs you may have about your own fertility.  When you've completed it, shoot me an email and let me know what you uncovered about yourself, I would love to hear about it!

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*Questions adapted from - Credit.